Overcoming Anger Part 1

In this first episode of our Overcoming series, Dave and Bethlie discuss the topic of Anger.  

Overcoming Anger

Quote:  We are a society addicted to outrage. Martin Wickens

In the social media world, outrage generates more “clicks” and ad revenue than anything else

1. What does the Bible say about anger?
   1. Various words are used
      1. Anger
      2. Angry
      3. Wrath
   2. Be ye angry and sin not, let not the sun go down on your wrath
   3. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamour and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice
   4. A soft answer turns away wrath
   5. Fathers provoke not your children to anger

2. What does anger look like?
   1. an outward explosion
   2. a simmering resentment
   3. harsh words
   4. Rage
   5. An angry person is churlish, mean, unkind
      1. Illustration of Nabal
         1. churlish - difficult, fierce, intense
         2. Evil - bad, disagreeable, giving pain, unhappiness, or misery)
   6. An angry person is difficult to get along with
   7. Anger leads to bitterness and poisons an individual as well as everyone close to them - especially one’s spouse and kids 

3. What do we know about anger?  Some things to understand:
   1. If you are single, know this:  an anger issue always gets worse after marriage.
      1. “with a furious man you shall not go . . .”
      2. It is impossible to live with an angry man without making him angry
      3. Same is true for an angry woman
   2. The target of anger is not the cause
      1. You are not to carry the responsibility for a spouses anger or a parents anger 
      2. It is not your fault if your spouse is angry
      3. It is not your fault if your parents are angry
   3. Regarding men:
      1. anger is fueled by testosterone and is different than a woman’s anger
      2. Anger is physical often before it is processed
         1. (think of punching a wall)
         2. Crying is a woman’s response to feeling unloved; anger is a man's response to feeling disrespected
      3. Talking things out will not make things better
         1. A man has to process his anger before he can talk
         2. Talking about it in the moment will only increase his anger 
         3. give him time to golf, piddle in the garage, or whatever 
            1. This is how he processes his emotions
            2. Very few men process their emotions by talking
   4. Regarding women:  
      1. Anger is fueled by emotions and wounds
      2. Anger is often a result of unresolved conflicts 
      3. Anger is sometimes the result of unmet expectations